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      <span class="title" itemprop="headline">男人不要看（但你硬要看我也拿你沒輒就是惹）</span>
      <p class="time article" itemprop="datePublished" datetime="2008-06-12T12:50:52+08:00">June 12, 2008｜<span>瀏覽人數  3,104 次</span></p>
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        <p><div><img src="frontend/cover/default.png" width="225" height="300" alt="水獺.jpg" hspace="5" align="left"></div>姨媽來惹姨媽來惹～
<br />難怪前幾天本人陷入人生的低潮
<br />腰酸背痛一直漲奶
<br />生病了可恥的在家抱著海獺一直哭
<br />坐在公車上看著窗外還會覺得很像人生走馬燈
<br />然後情不自禁的悲傷起來。
<br />年紀大了後經前症候群好像變嚴重惹
<br />總覺得小時候不會醬
<br />而且我會正式知道經前症候群這件事還是艾略特（也就素黃爽爽）告訴我的
<br />記得幾年前某天我和老頭江姊在樓梯口聊天
<br />我們兩個女生一直抱怨著莫名的腰酸背痛小腿漲
<br />場中唯一的男士艾老頭就問我們
<br />：是不是那個快來了？
<br />我們才知道，原來那個來前會有這些症狀
<br />所以縮我家老頭是女孩兒們的好朋友
<br />請大家趕快把他娶回家。
<br />既然提到了姨媽，不如再來提一下不辣甲（到底她們有什麼關係．．．）
<br />有些人姨媽來前會漲奶，漲到大一個罩杯，這個時陣去買奶罩會覺得自己長大而沾沾自喜，但一切都只是幻覺，隔沒兩天就縮回去惹，只剩下一件大到會灌風進去的不辣，嗯湯啊嗯湯。
<br />既然提到了大內衣，不如再來提一下好友克＊＊
<br />克＊＊很可恥，堅稱她有C罩杯
<br />敝人常看著她寒酸的胸部偷偷覺得她有C老娘就F惹
<br />直到有一回我去試穿她推薦的莎露後，克＊＊罩杯之謎終於宣佈破案
<br />原來莎露為了討好台灣女性罩杯故意做很淺很淺
<br />本人有時穿C有時穿D
<br />但穿上莎露的D後輕輕一撥奶頭就整個飆粗乃
<br />小姐堅持我要穿E才夠用，搞不好還要動用到F
<br />騙肖ㄟ
<br />人類一走進莎露就變乳牛惹
<br />做生意的這麼不誠實難怪克＊＊對它這麼死忠
<br />建議小罩杯的女性下班後不妨去莎露走一圈（閃電我不是在說妳）
<br />自信心馬上回到妳身邊。
<br />既然提到奶罩，最後再提一下好友艾老頭好了←這梗還真是玩不膩
<br />艾公略特雖然是一條鐵漢
<br />但有一身教人穿內衣的絕技
<br />他教我上身要前倾45度
<br />把整個手臂和副乳部份的肉都撥到奶罩裡變正乳
<br />他不但手勢非常精準可以拍成教學錄影帶
<br />還會邊撥邊唱“難得～一身好本領　情關始終闖不破”
<br />可惜至截稿為止尚未有人可以讓他撥
<br />最後再度呼籲適婚年齡的女性朋友快把他娶回家吧
<br />像醬一個可以幫妳把副乳全部撥成正宮娘娘的男性
<br />絕對是值得您托付一生的好對像～</p>

<p>註：照片是我心愛的海獺，那天抱著牠哭後本人領悟到能在身邊的最可貴
<br />我決定不再迷戀彭于晏和金鋼和友常惹！
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