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      <span class="title" itemprop="headline">大餅臉再會惹</span>
      <p class="time article" itemprop="datePublished" datetime="2008-04-30T13:26:39+08:00">April 30, 2008｜<span>瀏覽人數  2,925 次</span></p>
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        <p><div><img src="frontend/cover/default.png" width="375" height="281" alt="怪圖.jpg" hspace="5" align="left"></div>認識我五年以上的人都應該知道
<br />從前的我是個可悲的大餅臉
<br />肥頭大臉人又胖，看起來像幾個孩子的媽
<br />可現在的我脫胎換臉，下巴尖到可以鑿壁借光
<br />不是我有養小鬼，上輩子也沒有燒好香
<br />為了感謝大家的支持
<br />今天本人就要在此公開我小臉的秘密～
<br />話說數年前我不知看了什麼電視
<br />上面說打臉可以促進血液循環之類的
<br />為了擺脫脖子上方那坨發酵的麵糰
<br />我開始早晚各甩自己巴掌一百下
<br />一定要提醒大臉的同道中人
<br />千萬不要對自己太好，輕輕打不會有效
<br />要用生命去打，當臉是殺父仇人釀的打，我每次打完臉都很紅
<br />不過用力就好萬萬不可使用輔助品，打到休克就不好惹
<br />成效一開始不是那麼顯著，但三個月後臉真的會慢慢變小
<br />我持續打了一年，已然變成一個臉小身體大的怪物
<br />為了怕臉再小下去會像MIB裡的外星人
<br />我現在都不敢打惹</p>

<p>今天的宅女生活智慧王在此告一段落
<br />希望對電視機前的大臉朋友棉有點幫助
<br />謝謝收看～</p>

<p>註：照片是我在估狗輸入“甩巴掌”跑粗乃的，雖然差狠多但我覺得這張照片真不錯，所以硬是貼惹～免得又是到尾大家看了不酥湖．．．</p>

<p>又
<br />突然想到有天我在房間打紅了眼
<br />我老木跑進來問我要不要幫我打
<br />我開始懷疑我不是她親生的
<br />再者我這麼漂亮怎麼可能是眼前的歐巴尚生粗乃的
<br />我一定是林青霞的小孩
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