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      <span class="title" itemprop="headline">帶孩子的Know How</span>
      <p class="time article" itemprop="datePublished" datetime="2012-03-19T12:34:33+08:00">March 19, 2012｜<span>瀏覽人數  4,845 次</span></p>
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        <p><div><img src="https://s3-ap-northeast-1.amazonaws.com/showoncc/uploads/photo/asset/573/2243835_8iq7nx1_l.jpg"></div><br>不好意思我又來進行我的媽媽寶包頻道了
<br />誰叫現在這個夜深人靜的摸們有個孩子正躺在我後面盯著我呢。</p>

<p>最近因為家裡多了嬰兒，身為黃花大閨女的在下竟然學習了一些育兒知識
<br />今天就跟讀者們分享一下吧，不管怎樣人生中總有機會遇到的
<br />我家這個孩子很瘦小，都四個半月了體重才4400克
<br />去預防針時被護士說沒握過這麼細的腿，在診療室被大聲報出體重後
<br />出來竟然有別的媽媽來鼓勵我姊叫她不要在乎別人的眼光
<br />身為超重家庭的一員家姊溫蒂自然是感到十分羞恥
<br />於是一天到晚找到機會就灌她奶希望她快快長大
<br />但灌下去她也不會乖乖的就喝了啊
<br />常一頓飯要餵到一個多小時之間她還會喝到睡著
<br />不然就是東看西看分心分的很嚴重
<br />只要從她前面經過她就會很開心的跟你腮眼尾，立馬把喝奶這事兒完全拋到腦後
<br />所以餵奶時閒雜人等不准在她視線內晃
<br />要是眼神跟孩子對溫蒂就會陰沈的說＂不要看她～～＂這樣
<br />我想說是有多嬌看會把她看壞嗎。</p>

<p>上次我們出去玩一家子在車上，她本來一直睡著的半路突然醒來看著我媽
<br />此時家母立刻看著窗外不敢跟她眼神對到，據說只要不小心跟她對到孩子就很有可能會哭鬧
<br />但在車上又不能把她抱起來，所以唯今之計就是別看她
<br />望著窗外你不看她她不看你才是上上策
<br />原來嬰兒就是蛇髮女妖不能跟他四目交接的啊
<br /><div><img src="https://s3-ap-northeast-1.amazonaws.com/showoncc/uploads/photo/asset/574/2243833_3qzftxv_l.jpg"></div><br></p>

<p>現在我在房間寫稿而她娘因為要去擠奶，就暫時把她放在我身後的床上睡著
<br />不過剛剛她突然醒來吚吚啊啊了一陣而且越吚越大聲
<br />根據經驗再不理她就要哭了吧，於是我呼叫溫蒂縮妳女兒醒了
<br />她只回我四個字<b>不要看她！</b> 
<br />難道不看能解決問題嗎我心中充滿疑惑
<br />在下把這件事寫在FB上結果很多媽媽都說這是對的
<br />如果不小心理了她她會熱情奔放的玩起來，那暫時就無法做自己的事了叫我要三思
<br />而且很多媽媽都遇過這種事，最後大家都學會了孩子一醒來看著自己就要馬上裝睡方能駛得萬年船
<br />我越想越害怕就淺淺的回頭瞄了一眼，結果她張著閃亮的大眼正在看著我呢
<br />我趕快回頭假裝寫稿，想到不小心跟她眼神對到要陪她玩一晚上的事好害怕。</p>

<p>可我打字打著打著都一直覺得背後毛毛的有種不酥湖的感節，暗處似乎有什麼在盯著我（抖）
<br />我把手抬起來換個角度從腋下偷看蛇髮女妖，她依舊張著水汪汪的大眼看我還面帶微笑很誘人
<br /><div><img src="https://s3-ap-northeast-1.amazonaws.com/showoncc/uploads/photo/asset/575/2243839_rlunzgi_l.jpg"></div><br>試問背後如果有個嬰兒用這種表情看你你要如何才能狠下心來不去咕雞他呢（融化）
<br />但想到家姊的教誨網友的叮嚀，我堅定的打電腦不回應她的感情
<br />此時她突然使出下一招，用嘴唇一直發出嘖嘖嘖的聲音逼我看
<br />就像倩女幽魂裡小倩用歌聲來吸引書生一樣真是太陰險了
<br /><div><img src="https://s3-ap-northeast-1.amazonaws.com/showoncc/uploads/photo/asset/576/2243845_3dsatav_l.jpg"></div><br>我又從腋下偷看她（←不知道在怕什麼）她邊嘖邊深情的看著我研判是想吸引我去跟她玩吧
<br />像小倩輕輕的叫著「采臣～采臣～」一樣。</p>

<p>現在我決定要用兩個後空翻翻出房間離開這個可怕的地荒
<br />上次看《咒怨》的時候好像也沒怕成這樣
<br />若是要問帶嬰兒ㄟKnow How洗瞎密，我想就是千萬不要跟他四目交接吧
<br />但交下企糾竟會花生什麼事呢，我真的不敢試啊（抖）。</p>

<p>後記：
<br />後來我跟巨嬰阿土他娘談到貝貝太瘦被安慰的事
<br />她縮阿土則是太大隻人家都以為他其實很大了，跟他玩才知道他不會講話只會吚啊
<br />她也會憂心別人覺得她兒子很笨話都說不好可他明明還很小
<br />所以過大過小都有煩惱之處就請溫蒂別再介懷了
<br />只能說當媽真辛苦什麼事都有得煩</p>

<p>還有那天貝貝真的比較歡，溫蒂縮是因為在我房間她有感覺我會跟她玩所以精神忒好這樣
<br />平常她聽費雪海馬頂多聽兩次就閉眼了
<br />那天她聽到第三次還在跟費雪玩摔角
<br /><div><img src="https://s3-ap-northeast-1.amazonaws.com/showoncc/uploads/photo/asset/577/2243837_gk6ikzh_l.jpg"></div><br>孩子真的不能讓她覺得有人要跟他玩
<br />不然會起歡顛一整夜超嚇人的啊</p>

<p>主照是她一邊吃奶嘴一邊吃手
<br />她最近對奶嘴沒興趣了對手比較有興趣，所以會把奶嘴歪一邊方便放手進去
<br />有時還把奶嘴吐了直接塞拳頭進嘴裡
<br />真是個有才華的寶包啊～</p>
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